Monday, October 4, 2010


I feel like I should have updated a little sooner...That's weird. I was going to say "because I didn't want to leave you hanging or worry you" but who am I talking to? I can't decide whether I'm writing this stuff for myself or for a nonexistant community of readers. And even if people do start reading this blog later, they won't be in suspense, because they can just browse the archives without having to wait for me to update.

I stopped hearing Jill around 3:30. She must have stopped pacing kind of abruptly, or else I dozed off. Either way she seemed fairly normal on Sunday, although she didn't get up until late (which makes sense, neither did I). Today however I came home from class to find this in our bathtub:

For a second I thought it was blood. It scared the shit out of me. Then I looked again and realized she'd broken a bottle of nail polish. There were still bits of glass in the polish, which was almost dry, and the rest of the bottle was in the trash. I picked the glass out and have been waiting for the polish to dry so I can clean it. I texted Jill, and she replied "sorry about the mess i'll clean it later. @ christians btw not coming home tonite." So I don't know. It's a little annoying but I'm going to cut her some slack, just because she's finally out of the house.

I guess this is drifting away from an art blog little by little. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. On the one hand, it's very calming to write this stuff down and get it out of my head. On the other hand, I'm pretty sure this isn't very interesting to a lot of people. But then again it's not like there was a huge audience for the art posts, so it's not like it matters much anyway. I'm sorry if I sound whiney about not having an audience, it actually doesn't bother me that much.

So being as this is a way more personal blog now, I think I'll talk about myself a little. I'm a little weirded out by the fact that this is more about Jill than me.
I lost my waitressing job last week, but didn't talk about it here because it was bumming me out too much. I didn't get fired, as such, more like downsized. I used to work at this restaurant called the Broadway Diner, which was this 50's style diner (exactly what it says on the box, right?). It wasn't an amazing job but I do like having money, and now that they can't afford to keep me, I'm a little bit worried about my finances. My mom says it's manageable, but she and Ted (my stepdad) already work so much, I feel selfish not contributing anything. My dad doesn't contribute a lot to my education, but he's got my half-sister Hannah and his wife Laurie doesn't work because of her health problems, so I don't mind much that he doesn't pay for me.

I guess my family's kind of weird- I barely see my dad and his family, not because he and Mom had a bad divorce, but just because he's in California and we were in Flagstaff, and somehow we never got around to seeing each other much. Meanwhile I almost have two moms, since Mom moved in with her sister Caroline when she and Dad divorced. We lived with Aunt Caroline and her son Andrew for about 4 years, and then when Mom married Ted, we only moved like 2 blocks away, so Andrew and I hung out a lot. He's basically my little brother (he's a year younger than me and at UC Santa Cruz right now). We call each other constantly.
Weirdly, I barely know my half-sister Hannah, who is I think 16 now. I think the age gap was a big factor, and so was distance. I talk to her a lot on facebook these days, though, so we're getting closer. It's just kind of funny that I'm closer with my cousin than with my sister.

That was sort of an infodump, sorry. I'm rambling, and honestly I'm a little creeped out by being alone in the house at night. I think Jill's antics the other night have me seeing things out the windows, but when I really look it's just the trees moving. I think I'm going to call up Kevin and see if he wants to come over. He's learning kenpo, he could probably take out any intruders.

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