Sunday, April 24, 2011

the end this has to end

I'm writing this from a hotel room in Tucson. Last night I threw some clothes in my car and drove down here without sleeping, I didn't tell Mom or Ted I was leaving because they'd have come with me and I can't endanger I understand why Jill ran. I'm poison. I can't have this happen anymore. I have to do everything on my own now.
I am very very medicated right now and I'm still crying.
Yesterday I found out Jekyll died. And then a few hours later I got a call from the police. they said that a tall bald man in a suit and a short woman with greying hair had been seen entering my house, and the woman came out later, alone, with blood on her dress. The police were called but my neighbors, who made the call, said the woman had just vanished. The police found my door locked from the inside and when they knocked it down they found blood all over and Kevin
I can't even look at his name when I type it. My eyes keep sliding away.
They found him in the kitchen. They said he had tried to put up a fight. They didn't know how Harriet had overpowered him.
I can't duck this responsibility. I'm at fault and no one can say any different. she killed him because of me.

the police think I'm in flagstaff but my parents probably know I'm here so I don't have much time. I'm goingback to my house if I can face it, and I have to face it, because I neeed-
there's something there and I dont' know what it is but I know there has to be some kind of message from Kevin or Harriet or the fucking monster itself just something sometthing something I can do so I don't kill myself right now

going home, going home. this has to stop.

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